I had forgotten a few of the basics in the last few weeks when it comes to dealing with adversarial comments. The rules are pretty simple and they should have been learned early on. Unfortunately, I find myself in the position where I need to go back and learn them over again.
1. Don’t feed the troll. Don’t bait an internet interloper into a conversation that is not worth your time in the first place. There are those on-line who would like nothing more than the opportunity to snipe at you personally as part of their own smug campaign to paint you as a fool. Their basic argument is often without merit or based on personal attack. They can attempt to claim the moral high ground if you forget yourself for a moment and say something that they can use against you. In my case, the troll is an operative for an organization that is not what it seems to be.
2. “Put down the duckie”. When it comes to moving yourself forward the best advise I have seen to date on overcoming obstacles to allow you the ability to reach your goals comes from Sesame Street: (It’s 5 minutes out of your life, go ahead and watch)
3. No one can insult you without your permission. If someone comes after you with the express purpose of getting your “Irish” up, remember they can’t succeed unless you allow yourself to get pissed off. This may be a variation on “Don’t feed the troll”.
4. Don’t accept a “No” from someone who is not empowered to tell you “Yes”. If you want the man/woman at the top to answer your question, ask the man/woman at the top the question or make your request directly to them and not to some underling or proxy who is there to be an obstacle to you in the first place.
5. If you are going through hell, keep going (Winston Churchill). For many of us, the trouble is that we have stopped along the way. Dr. Seuss called the place we stop, The “Useless Place” (Oh,The Places You’ll Go). My advise, keep moving. I have found it useful to drop some of the baggage I have been carrying along the way. It is a lot easier to move forward without all the troubles and stresses (real and imagined) weighing heavy on you shoulders
6. History is written by the winner. If you want the abuse committed by Catholic Clergy relegated to the ash pile of history, let the Roman Catholic Hierarchy win. If you want a different outcome, stand up, form up and fight.
7. Finally, to quote the Dixie Chicks:
” I’m not ready to make nice
I’m not ready to back down
I’m still mad as hell and
I don’t have time to go round and round and round
It’s too late to make it right
I probably wouldn’t if I could
‘Cause I’m mad as hell
Can’t bring myself to do what it is you think I should”
Enough said, for now.
3 thoughts on “Don’t Feed the Troll (and other lessons I have to learn all over again)”
Excellent advice, for this situation and so many things in life.
I am concerned about people who are still angry about the same thing they were angry about 3 years ago, I mean, in 3 years, I’ve found a hundred more things to be mad about…
Love this advice, especially No. 5. Thank you for reminding me as my research continues.